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Have to love winter - hats are the perfect
bad hair day solution! |
Some of you know me personally, some of you know me through
Mums and Bums, some of you will know nothing about me whatsoever - and this blog post is mainly for those of you in the latter category! So go and make yourself a cup of coffee or tea (hot chocolate or a cold drink is more than appropriate too), sit back, relax and read on!
First off, who am
I? I am Emma, 29 years of age. And alone, I'm boring - really. But then you add my two gorgeous daughters to the mix, and I'm suddenly a lot more interesting! My eldest daughter is Gabrielle (aka Gaby), she was born 14 days overdue on October 26, 2006 - she is a lanky, hilarious, intelligent, thoughtful, sensitive little blondy, who upon her arrival into this world, gave my life meaning beyond anything I'd ever known before. My youngest daughter is Emersyn (aka Emmy) and she was born 1 week early - she's a sweet, funny, cheeky, mischevious, energetic, headstrong two year old. Yes - by headstrong I mean her favourite word right now is "NO!", and she enjoys telling it to me on an extremely regular basis. Her arrival taught me that the human capacity for love has no bounds, and that even if you are sure you can't love anyone or anything more than you already do, that you can. And you will.
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| My two beauties, November 2012. (L.Gaby, R. Emmy) |
The three of us live in Christchurch - life may be a little shaky here at times, and our pretty little suburb may look a lot worse for wear, but we are happy here. I moved here in 2001 and of course both of the girls were born here, it's the only home they know, only city they know - and with my parents (Nan and Poppa) living here, it has been host to a lot of happy family memories for all of us.
Little did I know though, that very first earthquake back in September 2010 put in motion a series of events which has eventually resulted in the girls and I making plans to move away from the Christchurch we love so dearly! I joined a local health and wellbeing forum in August 2010 - Emersyn was about 2 months old and I was on the lookout for other single parents to talk to, and that particular website had a single parents forum, and a group private message. I thought that sounded like what I needed so I registered, and was immediately in contact with other single mums.
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| In a word, Christchurch was 'munted' |
Fast forward to February 2011 - the really bad earthquake hit, and one of the women from the forum text me to stay in contact and make sure I was okay. Her name was Lauriel, and I thought it was particularly nice of her to think of me. Over the next few months we text on and off, but nothing too serious or regular.
Again we fast forward - this time to June 2011. You guessed it, there was another earthquake (two actually) and I decided that enough was enough, and for the first time since the earthquakes started, I felt the need to escape Christchurch. I packed the girls up and we went down to Oamaru with my friend who had been staying, we stayed the night there, before heading over to Wanaka to stay with my Grandma for a few days. Just before I left for Oamaru, I received a text from Lauriel, making sure we were all okay. Over the next few days we started to text each other a lot, and by the time I was ready to leave Wanaka, we were quite literally texting each other all day - we'd text upon waking, we'd text minutes before falling asleep... and when we were back in Christchurch the texting continued, and we found very quickly that we had a LOT in common, so much so that we joked we were twins.
The texting continued and then around the time the Rugby World Cup began, we started to talk on Skype. Though Lauriel was reluctant to start with, I soon got her interested in rugby, and after the pool match between the All Blacks and France (Lauriel is French), her rugby obsession had officially begun, much to her surprise, and I think also to everyone around her. The Rugby World Cup came and went, with the All Blacks ending the campaign as the victors, and after that Lauriel and I began talking even more and our friendship grew from strength to strength.
We had very honest conversations about things that you normally wouldn't discuss with someone you didn't actually KNOW in person, but we had that connection right from the start - and nothing was off limits, there was no such thing as TMI (too much information), and if anything, those conversations served to show us that we had even more in common than we had realised. Before long, we were thinking of each other as best friends, and I felt extremely lucky to have such an amazing woman & friend in my life.
In late November Lauriel told me she'd booked tickets to come down and stay with the girls and I during December/January while her children (Eloise, 8 & Aidan, 5) were with their Dad - and we were both incredibly excited! As December 28th grew closer and closer, we became more and more excited, and FINALLY that day arrived, but of course not before we had another sizable earthquake on December 23rd, and I had been surprised when my first instinct upon getting out of the mall, was to ring Lauriel and let her know I was okay!
Lauriel's flight was early, and she text me to say she was 'waiting under the big flag' - looking up I groaned as I saw what appeared to be about 20 big flags at regular intervals, so I had to try and look for her, whilst appearing as though I wasn't looking for her, but I soon found her and immediately we hugged and said hello. There was no awkwardness whatsoever, we began talking straight away, as if we saw each other everyday... I had to keep reminding myself that it was infact the first time I had been in her presence!
From the word go, things were comfortable between us - and a week into her visit things changed and we realised that we felt a lot more than just friendship for each other... and so began US. On December 28th Lauriel arrived and we were best friends. On January 11th Lauriel left and we were in love.
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| In Napier, on one of our many rugby dates (October 2012)! |
The past almost-11 months have been spent mostly apart, though we did manage to see each other for approximately 24 hours in March when Gaby, Terri (my sister) and I went up to Auckland to see Taylor Swift, and Lauriel drove up and met us there. In April Lauriel came down and we had a week and a bit in the school holidays (also going to see our first rugby game together), then in June, Lauriel came down for a weekend so we could go to watch the All Blacks vs Ireland (again with my sister, and her partner). A couple of weeks later, Lauriel was back down for a week (and another rugby game) in the July school holidays, and in the September holidays the girls and I flew up to Wellington, where we were met by Lauriel - and then drove to Wanganui, where we stayed for 18 days, giving the kids an opportunity to FINALLY meet (and we went to another rugby game).
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| Our four gorgeous children, September 2012. |
With four children and three exes between us, moving to be together immediately, was not an option, and we knew that we would have to spend time living apart, and for a long time it was an indefinite amount of time... Then one day, Emersyn's father told me that if the girls and I wanted to move up to be with Lauriel and her kids, that him and his girlfriend would also move up (he has family up there) - and FINALLY we had some hope that finally our long distance relationship would become a thing of the past - and the only distance between us would be the distance between point A and point B, while we were at work during the day.
Gaby's father has never played a HUGE part in her life, so after informing him that I planned to move up north with the girls - and him agreeing to that, we could finally get ourselves sorted and make plans for the big move up to Wanganui. The thought of leaving my parents was horrible, but at the same time - not being in the same house as Lauriel first thing in the morning and last thing at night was even worse, and I knew it was time to grow up and do what I had to do for MY family.
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| Together at another rugby game, late June 2012 |
On December 19th, Lauriel and the kids fly down for Christmas. On January 2nd Lauriel's kids are flying up to Auckland for their time with their Dad. Then on January 6th Lauriel, the girls and I are leaving Christchurch and driving to Wanganui. Flights are booked, the ferry is booked - all that is really left to do is to wait for the magical date to roll around, so we can start our life together, as a somewhat unconventional blended family.
Oh wait! Did I mention that we're also engaged and are getting married (sorry, having a 'civil union') on April 13th? And that we have a rugby theme? More specifically, a red and black (Canterbury, Crusaders) rugby theme. Considering my Dad is a staunch Otago/Highlanders supporter, I hope he will still agree to walking me down the aisle. Maybe if I suggest he can wear his Otago jersey?
